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[EPUB] ✼ My Lobotomy By Howard Dully –

Wow What an amazing story Rarely do books truly bring a tear to my eye, but anyone who is not moved by what this guy endured is surely bereft of a soul.I had heard of Walter Freeman, the doctor who popularised the use of the transorbital lobotomy, but reading the experiences and feelings of someone who d been on the other end of the ice pick is entirely different.Howard Dully was essentially loathed by his step mother She seems to have wanted rid of him, one way or another Bewilderingly, Howard s father and any number of medical professionals, and other adults who should have been in positions of responsibility, allowed Freeman who was neither a trained surgeon or psychiatrist , to poke an ice pick into the brain of a 12 year old boy and jiggle it around a bit.Unsurprisingly, this pretty much screwed up Howard s chances at leading a normal life Although not intellectually impaired, since Howard was not a child offender or mentally ill, the authorities didn t know what to do with him, leading him to eventually lead a chaotic and eventually criminal lifestyle.Having reached middle age, and to a great extent straightened his life out, educating himself, finding decent jobs and taking care of his family, Howard decided he needed some answers about what exactly was done to him and why it was allowed to happen This book is his account of that journey, one that is in equal parts moving, fascinating and unforgettable. I was terribly intrigued by what a lobotomy was and once I found that out, I was horrified that our society would ALLOW it to be done to anyone, much less a twelve year old little boy.But this book wasn t as entrancing for me as I d hoped it would be A big fan of memoirs, I love reading about others, discovering what makes them tick As sad as Howard Dully s story was, the writing style wasn t tight enough to satisfy A LOT of repetition throughout the same facts presented to the reader over and over in an attempt to convince that his stepmother truly did have it out for him from the beginning Yes, I can tell she s a nasty bitch pretty early on But it seems, throughout the book, that the author can t get past her ill intentions and must CONSTANTLY revisit and revisit the specific things she said and did on particular dates in a tiring effort to prove to the reader that it was all very unfair and unloving, and that he is entitled to feel pissed off about it all Yes, I READ what the author said she did on pages X, Y, and Z I remember it, know it was lousy, and need him to get on with what happened NEXT After moving past the sad details and recalling of childhood events, Dully grows up and, predictably, pretty much becomes a slacker, living a government funded flop house lifestyle and boring me with predictable accounts of promiscuity, theft, jail, homelessness, and so on It could have meant so much had Dully fought the odds earlier on and done something constructive with his life decisions to come out on top But that takes about forty year s worth of pages or so to happen.Dully is, even today in his 50s, still feeling very much a victim of his childhood, understandably so He says that he is now able to accept that he is a person who likes himself, regardless of if others can or will give him the approval he has always wanted but this is a sad statement that is not supported by his 288 pages of text Part of me feels I should give the guy a break the book was written by a 50 something bus driver who had a lobotomy But part of me feels what he delivered about his life, how it all happened, and how he responded was kind of predictable, despite the amazing circumstances And I can t help but think there is at least something the tiniest bit valid in his father s attitude now that it doesn t do one any good to go out and roll around in the manure to keep bringing up bad things that happened to us in the past it only brings you down and there is nothing you can do to change what happened Whether or not his father finally tells Dully of his love and regret no spoiler here , no one should actively seek out or live in negative energy.This was an OK book, and I do want to hear the NPR radio show about Dully s experience So, for me, it was a worthwhile read chilling but not a gripping, satisfying page turner that I so enjoy. At Twelve, Howard Dully Was Guilty Of The Same Crimes As Other Boys His Age He Was Moody And Messy, Rambunctious With His Brothers, Contrary Just To Prove A Point, And Perpetually At Odds With His Parents Yet Somehow, This Normal Boy Became One Of The Youngest People On Whom Dr Walter Freeman Performed His Barbaric Transorbital Or Ice Pick LobotomyAbandoned By His Family Within A Year Of The Surgery, Howard Spent His Teen Years In Mental Institutions, His Twenties In Jail, And His Thirties In A Bottle It Wasn T Until He Was In His Forties That Howard Began To Pull His Life Together But Even As He Began To Live The Normal Life He Had Been Denied, Howard Struggled With One Question Why October , I Gather That Mrs Dully Is Perpetually Talking, Admonishing, Correcting, And Getting Worked Up Into A Spasm, Whereas Her Husband Is Impatient, Explosive, Rather Brutal, Won T Let The Boy Speak For Himself, And Calls Him Numbskull, Dimwit, And Other Uncomplimentary Names There Were Only Three People Who Would Know The Truth Freeman, The Man Who Performed The Procedure Lou, His Cold And Demanding Stepmother Who Brought Howard To The Doctor S Attention And His Father, Rodney Of The Three, Only Rodney, The Man Who Hadn T Intervened On His Son S Behalf, Was Still Living Time Was Running Out Stable And Happy For The First Time In Decades, Howard Began To Search For Answers December , Mr And Mrs Dully Have Apparently Decided To Have Howard Operated On I Suggested They Not Tell Howard Anything About It Through His Research, Howard Met Other Lobotomy Patients And Their Families, Talked With One Of Freeman S Sons About His Father S Controversial Life S Work, And Confronted Rodney About His Complicity And, In The Archive Where The Doctor S Files Are Stored, He Finally Came Face To Face With The TruthRevealing What Happened To A Child No One Not His Father, Not The Medical Community, Not The State Was Willing To Protect,My Lobotomy Exposes A Shameful Chapter In The History Of The Treatment Of Mental Illness Yet, Ultimately, This Is A Powerful And Moving Chronicle Of The Life Of One Man Without Reticence, Howard Dully Shares The Story Of A Painfully Dysfunctional Childhood, A Misspent Youth, His Struggle To Claim The Life That Was Taken From Him, And His Redemption It s appropriate that one of this book s most salient elements is what it lacks any discussion of the neurophysiology of behavior This absence is refreshing but also surprising With the recent flood of neuro literature on the shelves today, one expects a book about lobotomy to review and presumably critique the current research on brain function But Dully eschews this scientific or scientistic territory, favoring the engaging human interest elements of his story the malevolent stepmother, the beleagured and unavailable father, etc The result is a book that reads like a standard if we can use that word memoir of child abuse than an outlandish story of mental incapacity This makes the whole thing banal, but it also makes it relatable and, therefore, tragic.One of the book s most satisfying maneuvers is that it draws tragic parallels between the life of the author and that of Freeman, the man who performed the titular operation The take home lesson or one of them, at any rate is that we are, one and all, damaged creatures, and we too often allow ourselves to become instruments for damaging others Lobotomy is only one grotesquely literal expression of this all too human cycle. Yet another book that makes you just want to find a kid to hug The most heartbreaking part of his story is how no one ever spoke to him, when what he really needed was someone to step in and take him out of a really shitty family situation. My Lobotomy is one of the most shockingly intense books I ve ever read The true story of a young man whose entire personality and state of being was compromised by a barbaric surgical procedure, this book really teaches that age old phrase, if we don t learn from the past, we ll be doomed to repeat it. He poked these knitting needles into my skull, through my eye sockets, and then swirled them around until he felt he had scrambled things up enough 97.December 15, 1960, at 12 years old, Howard Dully s life changed forever.On November 30, 1948, Howard was born to Rodney and June Dully Two brothers followed, Brian and Bruce Bruce, the third child, was born brain damaged June had been ill and 12 days after Bruce s birth, died, never leaving the hospital Colon cancer, undiagnosed until after death, had grown unchecked within her Howard and Brian were without a mother Bruce would never live with them Four year old Howard Dully was told his mother would never come home again she was gone.Enter Lou in 1955 with her sons, Cleon and George Howard writes, All I knew is one day she wasn t there, and the next day she was 18 Known for her temper, Lou became the deciding factor leading up to the day Howard s life changed On December 15, 1960, psychiatrist Walter Freeman poked ice picks into Howard s eye sockets, performing a transorbital lobotomy.Lou had issues with Howard she made it quite clear she wanted him out of the picture Lou shipped him off to stay with close friends, complained frequently to his father, Rodney, about Howard s behavior, and finally took him to six psychiatrists to find out what was wrong and how to fix him The psychiatrists said, Howard s behavior was normal 59 Then Lou met Walter Freeman.After the lobotomy, Howard was bounced around from psychiatric institutions to boarding schools, but never, permanently, to live with his brothers, father, and stepmother again After the lobotomy, after being in the system, Howard wants to know why this happened to him Why did he become one of Freeman s youngest patients when six psychiatrists said that he was normal My Lobotomy is a careful step back for Howard on a subject that he has never discussed freely until now He writes and researches to find out why he deserved such an operation as a transorbital lobotomy and what happened to Freeman s other patients I ve always felt different wondered if something s missing from my soul Howard Dully, NPRI highly recommend My Lobotomy a Memoir, a mentally painful book which made me question how Freeman was allowed to perform such an invasive, horrible, mind altering procedure, the transorbital lobotomy, so long unchecked.For information about the book and Howard Dully s journey into his past, visit National Public Radio s All Things Considered for My Lobotomy Howard Dully s Journey at Howard Dully memoir recounts in great detail and candor his struggle to discover why he was lobotomized at age 12 Although I certainly felt for him and appreciated the enormity of his struggle to find truth and closure, I do wish I had come away from the book with a deeper understanding of the effect the actual procedure had on him I understood that much of the trouble he had in his later life had to do with the fact of the awful betrayal his parents committed in allowing this to be done to him, and alsoin large part to their subsequent abandonment of Howard to various institutions and ofster homes but I didn t understand how the procedure itself made him feel, whether it dulled his emotions, made him forgetful, or anything else I didn t understand what his level of functionality was after the lobotomy versus before Still, a brave and fascinating account. I read this book carefully as my grandfather had bi polar disease or manic depression as it was called then and regular electric shock treatments and was recommended a lobotomy I could not for the life of me see what difference a lobotomy made to the author He suffered not a single one of the complications of the operation and it was only his shame at having been lobotomized that affected his life He made it the centre of his life when it was really not the issue at all.The issue was the extreme child abuse, of which the lobotomy was part, handed out by his stepmother, a classic wicked stepmother for true The stereotype of Snow White s murderous stepmother, the abusive stepmothers of Cinderella, Hansel and Gretel, even Imogen s stepmother in Shakespeare s Cymbeline are all brought to life in the person of the second Mrs Dully and her hateful, enabling husband, Dully s un natural father.I understand Mr Dully At 14 I was taken to Wales only 3 star Michelin restaurant for my first dinner alone with my father I was grown up This was wonderful Not Although he was still quite young my father had had several heart attacks it ran through the men in the family and would eventually kill him and he told me over dinner that my behaviour towards my mother was causing his heart attacks and that if he died, it would be my fault He said that my mother was his wife, the woman he had chosen to marry and I was only the daughter born to them and if he had to choose, he would choose her So, in the same way that my father enabled my mother to abuse me in every which way and even joined in when requested, so did Dully approve of his wife s awful treatment of his son He took scarcely 48 hours to approve a pre frontal lobotomy performed through his son s eye socket with an ice pick It wasn t the ice pick that did the damage it was Dully and his chosen bride.Howard Dully acknowledges that his stepmother was the author of his problems, that without her he would probably have been a normal kid, teenager and adult, but he doesn t blame her for all his shortcomings, he blames the lobotomy instead His reconciliation with his weak father is that of a little boy wanting to be kissed and hugged and made to feel loved and wanted, but the father, that cold and unnatural man, cannot bring himself to even give his son that, not even a simple hug and kiss and I ve always loved you my son , he s still with his evil bride in the spirit if not in the flesh.Howard had no confidence in himself, he felt himself to be the lowest of the low and acted this out for most of his life It is only when he is valued for his first hand knowledge of lobotomy, his articulate intelligence and beautiful speaking voice that he recovers and, at last, begins to live the life of a successful man, successful in all ways You can t recover from a lobotomy, but you can recover from the damage of abuse and he did recover and I m glad of that, I like my stories, fairy tales or anything else, to have happy endings Good luck for the future, Mr Dully. This book annoyed me from the beginning It s the literary equivalent of The Da Vinci Code While I realize that lobotomy is not an accepted form of psychiatric treatment today, back when Howard was growing up and exhibiting a large number of red flags concerning his state of mind from failing in school, to doing drugs, to robbing places, his inability to connect with any other people and generally refusing to take any responsibility for his own actions, I can completely understand why the lobotomy happened to him especially with his stepmother lobbying for help to anyone who would listen I just couldn t stand how he proves himself as a huge, whiny victim the entire time and then, finally, at the end decides that what really needs to happen in someone s life is that they take responsibility for it No doubt Too bad he couldn t have learned that lesson 40 years earlier and stopped me from having to be bored to death with his poor me, I m a victim book Plus, it s very convenient that he never remembers the bad things that he has done even though they are part of the public record , but remembers every single little horrible thing that anyone else has ever done to him My feelings don t have anything to do with whether or not a lobotomy should have been performed on him, because that is quite drastic, but we are talking about a long, long time ago and the standards for care were completely different.